You Don’t Have to Fit In to Belong

Fitting In is Exhausting. Belonging is Rest.

Let’s talk about something I know you’ve felt before… the pressure to fit in.

In Episode 6 of the Graced to Lead Podcast, my conversation with Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith unpacked what it means to be fully known, and how we often confuse fitting in with actually belonging.

Whew. That hit me hard.

Because I’ve led in rooms where I didn’t look like anyone else. I’ve been the only woman. The only believer. The only one with a quiet voice and a loud purpose. And for too long, I tried to blend instead of belong.

Woman sitting in a park reflecting on emotional wellness & restoration

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Dr. Saundra reminded us that when we feel the need to shrink, conform, or hide parts of ourselves to fit into a space… that’s not belonging.

“Belonging isn’t being like everyone else. It’s filling a God-void with your presence.”

Yes, yes, YES! You weren’t designed to match the room.You were made to carry something into the room.

God isn’t intimidated by your doubts. He welcomes them.

Here's what I learned:

• You don’t have to choose between strength and softness.

• You don’t have to have all the answers to be a vessel.

• You don’t have to fit a mold to belong in leadership.

Dr. Saundra says that emotional wellness is the root system of our leadership. And if we don’t go deep in reflection, wholeness, and restoration - we’ll fall over in the wind.

You are not here to copy anyone.

You’re here to show up fully, because you belong.

With grace,

Belinda

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Next Steps:

1. Listen to + Download Episode 6.

2. Want to go deeper? Book a coaching session with me.

Reflection Questions:

1. Where have I confused fitting in with true belonging?

2. What does “being fully known” mean in my leadership today?

3. Where is God asking me to be bold and bring my full self?